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Words, Words, Words

Words Can Hurt

Do any of you remember when parents told their kids that “Sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me”? I know they were just trying to make us feel better, although words can hurt. The recent Oscars ceremony just emphasized that issue. I didn’t see the event in real time, but in all of the articles I’ve read about the Will Smith slap, not one talked about the “joke.” Yes, of course, assault is beyond unacceptable and, as someone who occasionally speaks from a stage, this incident was a bit scary. I’m glad that action has been the subject of much discussion.

What I would like to review here, though, from a WORDS perspective, is the “joke.” We often try to be funny by “making fun” of someone or something. Even gently, as a friend, we “tease.” It’s easy to cross the line, though. What we might think is meaningless (“I didn’t mean anything by it”) might be extremely hurtful to another. Especially when criticizing someone else’s looks: “Look how ___ (s)he is!” (Fill in the blank with any description, e.g. fat, skinny, short, tall, bald). “You have big ears” might sound like a factual statement, but not when it’s used in a derogatory manner, with pointing or laughing involved.

The slap, and the ensuing conversation, was a wake-up call to me. I was going to post an April “Fools” discussion about commonly mispronounced words, but the version I originally wrote could very easily be interpreted as making fun of the folks who mispronounce the words. Oops! Not my intent at all. I decided to take another look at my words.

And how appropriate that I am almost finished with my 4th Mr. Smiles book that talks about bullying!!

When thinking about this topic, I was dismayed to see how many words we have in our language intended to criticize other people: put down, razz, tease, pick on, bully, make fun of, harass, push around. I’m sure you can think of more.

Words shouldn’t hurt, but they do, no matter what our parents might have told us. I’d like to hear your thoughts on this topic. Thank you!

P.S. I’m saving the commonly mispronounced words for next month.😊

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